sábado, 14 de agosto de 2010

The Twilight Avenger gets a name

Frampton Compton undressed lazily at dawn. The patrol had been intense and exciting. It was time to send the superhero to bed and the supercostume to the washing machine. Only two hours to alarm ring. He had to decide between sleeping or having breakfast. “Bellyman” opted for resting and eliminating the body excuse for that horrible nick. The double-life man read briefly a The Mighty Avengers Marvel Comic and glimpsed a New York City postcard with the word “twilight” written on it. He slept on a brand new name: A vindicator...only working at night...masked hero... This was it! The Twilight Avenger. Spectacular. Sublime. Terrific. The bad guys’ lash. Like a kick in the very face. But he had to start doing some exercise: Sit-ups and push-ups. And no more cocoa cream with honey and peanut butter spread on the doughnuts. But the clock woke up both his body and his stomach. Maybe tomorrow. After dinner. Or supper.

martes, 13 de julio de 2010

"Who are you?"

A frightened girls scarcely escapes a bunch of evil men. She pants, gasps, puffs and reaches a saviour corner. But, when she goes round, it literally and figuratively turns to be a dead line. The lovely girl nearly faints.The badmen stop running and begin walking solemnly. One takes out a pen knife; another the belt; the other ones a camera, a bloody-dripping syringe and a microphone. Then he appears: top of the roof, flying cape, dumb face and yellow jumping boots. He cries “Leave her alone or confront me, you of the evil stars, you worst than toothache.”
The gang look at each other until the masked hero jumps down to the blind alley. The pen knife guy receives spray in the eyes, and an expansion shock from the hairdrier-like pistol knocks the others out.

- Who are you? - says the relieved woman.
- Well, er, I, uh, I haven’t thought about a name or something. ¿What about “Heroman”?
- No, no, no. This is old-fashioned and vulgar. “Bellyman”. That’s it.
- What?
- “Bellyman”. It really fits you.
- Fuck off, you gust of disgust!
- But I only...

But the dull face saviour is long gone through igniting jets from his belt. He’s considering that “maybe I should replace this old tight costume. It makes me fat although I try to hide my float. And what the hell should I use as a nickname? The Vindicator Avenger? The Thief Eater? American Power? I will sleep on it. “Bellyman!” Fatty seal”.

miércoles, 7 de julio de 2010

Zinedine Zidane and the Gods of football

The 2006 Football World Cup Final was going to be the topping in the Algerian French player’s retirement cake, but instead, it cast the midfielder into the mists of back door goodbye, and Marco Materazzi’s chest into the bottom of French desperation.
Zidane was a genius in footballistic life and the perfect gentleman in public affairs. Honest, kind, goodhearted, but also hotblooded and moody, his career was full of brilliant plays and some shameful aggressions. Knowing that and being Italian, Materazzi exploited his dirty tricks against the core of the “bleus”. Zidane’s sending-off was not unfair, just the opposite, the French player really far deserved it. The point is, what kind of noble justice is it which allows the subterranean game to make a good person lose his tempers and –literally- his head?
Zinedine was worth a different end, maybe a Hollywoodian one, in which he scored the winning goal on the very last second of the extra time or the definite penalty in the final round. Almost nobody retires on top of the business. It football, at least, I cannot remember many. People believe in a very romantic sense of justice and rights and in an omnipresent God of football who, from time to time, put things in their right place. When the over-competitive Italy defeated the old France, he had to be on holiday watching a different TV channel. But this is life and top sport was not going to be much different. Zidane was fired because he couldn’t resist provocation or punish back in a slightly more indifferent manner.
This final blemish didn’t prevent the Algerian from receiving the Golden Ball award for the tournament, maybe because he was recognised not only for that World Cup merits, which were not very impressive, but for his complete career. At the end, people remembered him as a delicatessen with a mild sour taste at the end.

martes, 6 de julio de 2010

Coming back

I promised to come back if something happened. Well, I still don't know if "that thing" will occur, but I have decided to return anyway, whatever happens about my commitment.
I didn't want to continue this blog as, being a teacher of English, I didn't want to commit unforgivable errors. I will, but I don't care now. I won't allow self-correction to prevent my thoughts from pervading the webworld. So this is a sort of rebirth, and I'm happy about my second "web son".

martes, 9 de junio de 2009

Aphorisms


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  • ENGLISH IS EVERYWHERE. EVEN IN YOU.
  • I’VE LEARNT MORE FROM YOU THAN YOU FROM ME.
  • READING FEEDS THE SOUL. GET FAT.
  • THE ONLY THING I DON’T LIKE ABOUT YOU IS YOUR DEPARTURE.
  • LIFE IS NOT FAIR. I THINK IT’S MORE BLONDE-LIKE.
  • BE WISER IN FUTURE, BECAUSE YOU CAN’T BE NICER.
  • THERE ARE TWO THINGS I USUALLY MISS: THE BUS AND YOU.
  • SOME THINGS ARE NOT TAUGHT IN BOOKS BUT IN PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
  • MY LIFE IS DIVIDED IN TWO: BEFORE AND AFTER YOU.
  • I TRIED TO REMEMBER YOUR FAULTS BUT I FORGOT ALL.
  • AS FOR TEACHING, YOU MAKE IT SPECIAL.
  • A GOOD STUDENT MAKES A TEACHER EXCELLENT.
  • I LIKE THE WAY YOU SMILE IN ENGLISH.
  • WHEN I MET YOU I THOUGHT LIFE WAS WONDERFUL. NOW I’M SURE.
  • WORKING WITH YOU WAS NOT A JOB.
  • IF I EVER GOT ANGRY WITH YOU, IT WAS JUST TO GET CLOSER AFTERWARDS.
  • FRIENDSHIP IS A BOAT WHICH NEVER SINKS.
  • YOU ARE LIKE SACCHARIN: YOU MAKE LIFE SWEETER BUT AREN’T FATTENING.
  • AN ENVIOUS MAN SEES WHERE YOU ARE, NOT WHERE YOU COME FROM.

miércoles, 18 de febrero de 2009

Memories

Memories.
They are here to stay
To remind you of their pain over you
To make you cry
To make you prisoner of the past
To minimize the success of your insignificant present
To make you trip and fall
To kill you innerly.
Nostalgia is an old girlfriend
You don’t want to greet on your way
But she always bumps into you
Like an inkblot painted in the sky
Like a sadness you want to liven up
But that finishes your strength up
And gets you drunk of sorrow.

miércoles, 31 de diciembre de 2008

Embedded in life

It’s not that I’m gonna criticize the advantages of spare time. Everybody knows how paramount it is in our society. The point is, if you take away routines (I mean, rest, work, eating, children care, cooking, nature calls, communicating, housework), all you’ve got is a couple of hours per day, maybe four if you’re lucky and woman (if you’re a man forget about completing housework easily, it always takes three more times than a female).
The concept free time is very deceitful. You think you can do whatever you want, but, on second thoughts, your choice is overwhelmingly restricted. Try to be alone in the outside. Either you look for a deep enough long-lost cave or a steep mountain where, if it’s under x metres, you are not allowed to camp. Living in the wild is also forbidden. Everything is somebody’s and you can’t take, sleep on, use or eat it. To make love, do sports, take drugs, draw graffiti, be naked, swim, smoke or drink spirits you need your own gold-paid tight flat or a specific space-for building. Some of them can’t even be done in the street. Have you ever tried to go jogging nude when smoking a joint? What about every teenager’s ultimate dream nowadays: Having sexual intercourse at the same time as drinking a vodka with lemon without paying for room or pub fare?
Of course some laws and precepts are here to prevent everybody’s rights and blah, blah, blah, with liberty and justice for all, etc… That’s right, to a certain extent. Have you noticed that you must pay for everything? There are taxes on commercial products, on blank DVD’s, tobbaco, pictures, raw materials, manufactures. If you earn money you have to pay for it. If you’re lucky enough to win the lottery you are to share with the State. If you get it gambling a previous part of your profits have gone to the coffers of the Government. If you decide to give it freely to your best friend or relative or a tramp you find under a built-with-your-money bridge, you are committing a crime. The procedure is to declare your donation and pay a tax for it. Otherwise you could be investigated and fined.
Suppose your granny has been giving you a weekly tip of € 5 since you were born. Now you’re thirty and therefore you have € 9800. The State may ask you about the origin of that illegal, black money! If you use other people’s words without quoting, this is plagiarism. Copy a music CD and you’ll be a criminal. Create a brand and give it a name, only to discover that the name is registered by someone else and you are not allowed to use it in commercial terms.
I accept civilization implies you are not burying a hatchet into your neighbour’s brain, but from that aggression to not being able to step on a relaxing prairie or tranquil orchard because they belong to a proprietor I think there are thousands of restrictions we all might not need. The definite symptom of failed capitalism is homeless. In a world where you are what you possess, they are nothing. They can’t even rest on the pavement or live. The only thing they let you do in the street is walking or staying in a bench (sitting, never sleeping). The wild nature is no longer rivers and forests. Right now the wildest sides are people’s attitude about goods and possessions. How long until the poor crowd decide to go on strike against poverty, to abolish capitalism, to hang the rich, to share equally? Maybe tirany in The Third World is a failure of underdevelopment, but bums in metropolis is a hint of the same wicked disease.